I Wrote This At 4am Sick With Covid Link -

Finding a "cool spot" on the pillow that lasts for more than thirty seconds.

If you’re reading this because you also searched for this phrase at 4 AM—maybe you’re sick, maybe you’re scared, or maybe you’re just lonely in the dark—know that this window of time eventually closes. The sun will come up, the Tylenol will kick back in, and the world will start moving again. i wrote this at 4am sick with covid

Writing this feels like trying to type through a bowl of oatmeal. "Brain fog" is a polite term for what actually feels like a cognitive blackout. I’ll start a sentence, get distracted by the way the shadows are moving on the wall, and forget what the subject of the verb was. Finding a "cool spot" on the pillow that

But for now, in the blue light of my laptop screen, I’m just going to sit with the silence. I’m going to acknowledge that being sick is a vulnerable, human, and exhausting experience. And then, hopefully, I’m going to try to sleep. Are you currently riding out a fever, or Writing this feels like trying to type through

When you’re this sick, time ceases to be linear. My "day" is no longer measured by the sun rising or setting, but by the four-hour intervals between doses of Tylenol. The 4 AM window is the hardest because the distractions of the world have gone to sleep. My inbox is quiet. Social media is a graveyard of yesterday’s memes. It’s just me, my pounding headache, and the rhythmic, wheezing soundtrack of my own lungs.

The moment the fever breaks and the shivering stops, leaving you in a puddle of sweat that feels, oddly, like a triumph.